Event 28 of #fortyb4forty

I'm a bit late with this. My apologies.

So, the Woodland Way was hard. The aim was, in 6 hours, to run as many laps as possible. 4 laps would equate to a half marathon. When I entered this was my aim. Being treated for sinusitis and probable bronchitis in the week prior really played havoc at the actual event, and I struggled on the second lap so I had to call it a day. I still wasn't fully recovered. Gutted but pleased that I actually got out there and actually gave it a go. I didn't achieve what I wanted to do, but it was such a relaxed event anyway. And I did enjoy it. Nice to see a few people from running club too. I apologise for lack of photos as well.

So now? Still not completely well, but am under medical care for that now. But I haven't been told to stop running.............bring on event 29 hopefully soon 

Event 27 of #fortyb4forty

Triathlon probably isn't the first thing you would expect me to come out with - unless you are following my page on Facebook, or on Twitter.

So, to update you. During my recent holiday, I saw that GoTri Hamble were hosting the final in a series of tri events: a triathlon. A 160m swim, 6km bike ride, and a 2 km run. I was interested, but it would be something where I was putting myself out of my comfort zone - cycling is the one thing I am less keen on for various reasons. But anyway, I entered. Last night, I was seriously doubting that decision. 

Let me take you back to May 2015. I was a member of Herc Tri, a fairly newly formed triathlon club. I had entered a local triathlon event hosted by Try Tri - the May Day Tri. This was a 200m swim, 6km bike ride and 2.5km run. I managed the swim really well. The cycling, however, was my nemesis, partly due to not having trained as much, and the hills that were part of the course were quite steep. My error completely, considering that I had done a recce ride. Nevertheless, after completing the course, I was put off triathlon until now, as I had really struggled physically and mentally to complete the cycling element. Then running 2.5km on jelly legs, which included short but sharp hills, was just too much.

So back to today. The bike ride was always going to be my difficult area to overcome. After being reassured that the route was relatively flat, I was feeling okay, but knew I would still struggle having done no recent bike training. The swim was easy. Sorry, but it was. But swimming is the sport I focused in as a child into my teens, and I guess as a result it comes more naturally to me. After having some mechanical issues with my bike sorted prior to starting the race, I was nervous, and to be honest, at one point I wasn't sure if I as going to be able to even race due to the mechanical issues. Anyway,  I was cleared. The actual ride was hard for me (lack of training) but it wasn't difficult, and no where near as inclined as I had ridden (or walked) up during the May Tri. But I got around, and was happy.  Had the jelly legs after dismounting, and there was no way I could run to the field for the final element. I think I would have collapsed. But I got around the field with a mix of running and walking. I had to dig deep to keep going. I was very aware of a group from running club who had stopped on their run, and was cheering people on (thanks girls, I loved that. Apologies for seemingly ignoring you. I wasn't, I was very focused by the end of the run). 

And I finished. Very happy with the fact I finished and I did enjoy doing it. 

Having done some analysis of times and distances at my events today, I have come to the conclusion I did a brilliant job and, despite lack of recent training ( last minute entry and I was on holiday!!) in the run up to the event, my times are right on track with what I had been training at, which is better than going slower than training!! Happy days 😄

Next weekend, I'm doing a 6 hour event where I run as many laps of a course as I can manage in that time. Again, something a little more challenging than just doing a set distance race. 

Testing times

Doing 40 events before I'm forty seemed a good idea at the time 11 months ago or so. I knew it would tag me physically, but it has been the mental challenge in more than one way:

* having to wake up early to go to events more regularly than I did. Me and early mornings have never been friends and I will often have an argument with myself to hoick myself out of bed, particularly for parkrun.

*believing in myself that I can complete an event, even a 5k event, such as parkrun. Halfway round a distance my mind start telling me that's it's too far, that my body has had enough and let's just quit.

*The feeling that I can't be bothered, I'm too tired, I haven't eaten properly, finding a babysitter, it's too hot/cold, 

But here I am 26 events on now. Hauling myself out of bed, especially to get to parkrun. Fighting those inner voices which will continue to torment me, telling me I'm not good enough. 

I will admit, I will be glad when this challenge has finished. It's been a long haul, this year particularly. I've had to work hard to change my thinking and to fight the feelings of depression, and actually breaking the cycle of letting it rule my life; but instead regaining control, and ok, sometimes I can't be bothered to do X, Y and Z, but that's not depression. I'm being a lazy whatsit. I'm not denying that I've had depression, but this year I came to the conclusion that I really need to move forward and only I can really do that proactively, and not make excuses all the time. 

The weather has been really hot, and it has made recent events hard going. But last night I did take a  proactive look at my challenge, I now have 14 events left to do. Not including today I now have 25 weekends left to do 14 events. So I produced this:

Having written it out like this helped me to focus and look at where I can do events. If I really focus I can complete the challenge by Christmas time latest if I tried hard to get to parkrun each week, and find a few more events.

So I got this, right? 

Event 22 of #fortyb4forty

So event 21 for the sharp-eyed among you was Race for Life last Sunday.

Event 22 - Wyvern 10k. This is on home ground for me.

The weather - initially wet, but stopped. Cloudy, humid, making a run quite hard to push through when you feel like your wrapped in a fluffy blanket in a sauna. My running has taken a nose dive and I was worried and set myself a target of 1hour 15 mins, even though to just finish would be my ultimate target.

It was hot and very humid going around. Even the breeze was warm, uncomfortable and unpleasant. Thankfully there was water at frequent points on the course. As this was an event run by Hedge End Running Club there were a lot of marshals who were members so the support was immense which made a huge difference to getting around. As a result there were many opportunities for my picture to be taken and I decided to have some fun with it. (Photo credit to Paul Hammond for pictures 2,3,4)

Ultimately I came away from the course with a 10k personal best this year, although not a course PB, but not to far off it. Official chip time was 1:13:13. So very happy with that (previous chip time in 2014 was 1:11:39).

Half way

So today, I did my 20th event of #fortyb4forty. To recap I have done:

8 X 5km 

3 X 5 miles

4 X 10k

1x quarter-marathon

1 X 8 miles

1 X 10 miles

2 X half-marathon

I feel I should be more excited!!!! It's a downwards journey to counting down. 20 to go. Instead I am quietly contemplating the journey I have done so far - mentally and physically.

But it feels that the end is in sight. I will be honest, and at the moment, I will be glad when this challenge is finished. I'd love to beat my £500 fundraising target. I'm about £5 short of £300 which is amazing frankly.

I haven't entered any races recently and so far I have a 5k, a 10k and a 10 mile race already entered. So I'll need 17 more events............

Trying not to feel guilty

Today was the first time I have pulled out of a race due to having a cold and having shortness of breath (SOB) with it during my challenge.

I feel incredibly guilty that I couldn't manage it. The condition for the race were perfect - dry, not too hot, flat course. But even walking was testing my ability to hold a conversation without getting too breathless.

It was the sensible option. Last time I ran with a cold and SOB  I struggled. Really struggled. And I finished that run feeling worse than when I started.

Today should have been the 20th event of #fortyb4forty. Halfway. 

Anyway, I'm not going to let it get me down, I'm going to get better, get back out running, and move on and do the 20th event soon. 

Ponderings

I have just been seeing so many posts on Facebook about Endure- a 24 hour running event where you try as a team, a pair, or solo, to run as many laps as possible in a 24 hour period. I can honestly say I am completely awed by the commitment, endurance, team work and camaraderie that clearly came across in all these posts on my news feed. 

3 weeks ago I completely the Ox Half. As mentioned in my previous blog post, it was a test of my mental and physical endurance. Since then I have not been out for a run until today. It took about a week to recover from this half. I was soooo tired. My muscles also took a few days to recover. Not surprisingly, but unlike after the Southampton half marathon, I have not entered yet entered another race.

It's hard to put into words how I feel about running, or just exercise in general at the moment. Usually once I'm out there I'm fine and I get on with it. But why is the motivation to actually get my gear on and out the door so hard to do? I've heard people say that one should just get out there and do it. No messing around around, no feeling sorry for yourself. Just do it. Easy, right? Sounds like it should be. 

As a child I was a swimmer. I belonged to a club, trained at least twice a week, with lifesaving club, and synchronised swimming in top of that. Not that I excelled in synchro, but it was good fun all the same, and I can still skull my way up and down a swimming pool on my front and back with considerable ease, as I found out at a tri swimming training a while back!! 

I am determined to turn my mental health around. To not use it as an excuse all the time to not do something. In all aspects of my life. It's hard fighting against a voice that tells you it's not worth it, that you can't do this, that and the other, why did I start the fortyb4forty challenge, you need rest, too tired, I haven't eaten properly. So many excuses. But I want to fight them, and it's probably going to take baby steps, but I will get there. 

So that's where I am. My usual battle with an inner voice of a child who is being rebellious.